For Good
by EmpyrealFantasy
Summary: pre[SanzoGoku] In which Fate decides the boys are too hardheaded, and a certain Marshal has iffy belongings which send an unsuspecting trio...to meet themselves. «Gokucentric x Arc One of Two» [Complete]
1. Like a Comet Pulled From Orbit

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

A/N: Hi loves! New short story, won't be but a few chapters….tis another Sanzo/Goku. Because they are my loves. -hearts-

Warnings: Slash, cliché plot (even moreso than last time! Huzzah!), language, adult situations, violence, sexual implications, references to shouta, and likely OOC characters. This was just a plot bunny that wouldn't get out of my head no matter what I did…so, I am writing it to rid myself of it, so I can actually write an ORIGINAL piece of SanzoGoku. This one won't be it though, folks.

Timeline: Homura arc. Because he's hot, and though he won't play much of a roll…it's just fun. ;)

----------

**For Good**

_Like a Comet Pulled From Orbit…_

----------

It's often said that things happen for a reason, no matter how bizarre the occurrences are. It is rare for any event to happen that does not play a part in the scheme of things. It is, in fact, the reactions to said occurrences that shape our lives. Fate is not predetermined, but it tries to guide its children with deft fingers, usually succeeding in its wants. Unfortunately for Fate, its four favorite subjects were loathe to listen to even its least subtle of pushes. It was time to get drastic.

--

After another laborious day of travel and youkai battles, the Sanzo-ikkou began setting camp in the twilight. Spirits were not particularly down or up this day, as there had been no out of the ordinary moments or annoying gods of war to hinder their journey. Other than a run of the mill hoard of youkai sent by Kougaiji, the day had been utterly boring. And hot. All four members of the party were glad when the sun had sunk, taking with it the heat of the day and giving a nice breeze to cool them with.

Hakkai was already tending to dinner preparations, Goku had gone to find firewood, Gojyo was setting up the tents, whilst Sanzo smoked and 'oversaw' the rest of the group. The blonde had his usual scowl in place, but even he was more or less ambivalent in his mood.

They were camped against an outcropping of rock on the sparsely vegetated field, the only place with anything resembling shelter and not leaving them in the wide open. The field's grass, though tall, was dry and it had taken several treatments of both Gojyo's and Hakkai's weaponry to clear their little campsite sufficiently. Now the clearing was blessedly quiet - a fact Sanzo attributed to the lack of simian, since the monkey had had to go rather a way to the sparse grove of trees in the distance to gather wood - broken only by the muttered cursing of Gojyo as he struggled with the tents.

"Sanzo?" Hakkai called softly, breaking the silence, "Could you bring me my bag? The rations are inside."

The monk grunted his acquiescence and stalked to where their bags laid, picking out Hakkai's and delivering it to the green eyed man. The youkai smiled benevolently, bowing slightly before rifling through his things to pull out the food they had purchased to get them through these camped out nights.

Sanzo reclined against the rock wall, letting his eyes slide shut as he took a long drag off his cigarette. He was glad to be standing for the time being; long hours in the jeep really put a person off of sitting.

"Hakkai?" a slightly nasal whine sounded. All three members of the ikkou jumped a little, startled out of the silence by the return of the wood-toting monkey, "I don't feel so good…" 

"Yare yare, what's wrong, Goku?" the healer said immediately, abandoning his food preparations to walk up to the abnormally pale earth spirit.

"I dunno…" the teen replied, setting down the wood and stumbling a bit, "I feel…dizzy…and my head hurts…"

"Whiny monkey," Gojyo grumbled, watching Hakkai test the boy's temperature with the back of his hand and hiss.

"Not a monkey," Goku slurred, his golden eyes glassy and his body swaying slightly now.

"Oh my…" Hakkai said softly, putting an arm around the young man's waist, "Did you get any injuries in the fight this afternoon?"

Goku blinked rapidly, trying to concentrate on Hakkai's voice, but it was for naught, and the teen remembered little else before he blacked out, Hakkai barely catching him before he hit the ground.

Sanzo's eyes widened and without thinking he walked forward to assist the man-turned-youkai in maneuvering his charge to the ground, "What in the hell is wrong with him?" he bit out, growling slightly.

"I'm really not sure, Sanzo…he has a terrible fever…and he's never been ill, so I can only guess he was poisoned."

Hakkai began checking the boy for injuries, finally coming across the source of his troubles - a long, shallow gash that ran along Goku's hip. Using his ki, he could sense a minor poison and sighed. Sanzo was growing impatient, "Well?"

"He'll be fine with rest, this would have been a problem if used on you, but Goku's blood should counteract the toxins quickly. He needs rest though…it looks as if we will be staying here through tomorrow."

Sanzo cursed and scowled, "What in the hell do you mean, stay here? We have a journey to be on, we can't be held back because the monkey was dumb enough not to notice he was poisoned!"

Gojyo, finally joining the other members of the group, piped in, "You mean like those times _you_ were poisoned and we had to wait around for your ass?"

The monk hissed inarticulately, scowling at the hanyou and pulling his Smith & Wesson, "Say it again, cockroach."

Gojyo just took a step back silently, not wishing to push his luck without the monkey around to distract the priest's anger. Hakkai looked at them both and smiled, "Well, I will finish up dinner, could one of you put Goku into a tent? He will likely sleep through the night without trouble."

Gojyo took the initiative, grumbling about the 'lazy bouzu' and 'retarded saru'. The night was nearly boring without Goku to cause trouble, and all three of the elder men noticed it. Sanzo was the least comfortable with noticing his lack of happiness with his charge's absence, sneering at himself for such stupid thoughts. What did he care if the monkey wasn't being a loudmouth? It saved him a headache! But, try as he might, he couldn't completely ignore the little voice in the back of his head reminding him of how accustomed he had become to Goku's prattling in the six years he had been putting up with his pet.

It was hardly dark by the tine the ikkou turned in for bed, Gojyo taking first watch, and sleep overcame them.

----------

A/N: And, here's the beginning. Plot starts next chapter…like I had said, this story is just an idea that wouldn't leave my head alone, so I am writing it so I can write my next story, which will actually (gasp) be more story oriented, instead of just romance. This will, folks, be primarily romance and little real plot…but lots of romance plot! Yay! So what if I'm a sucker? ;)


	2. As it Passes the Sun

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

Hey look, plot! _Cliché_ plot, yes, but plot nonetheless. Just like I said in Complementary, I have a thing for them knowing, damnit.

----------

**For Good**

…_As it Passes the Sun_

----------

It was shouting that broke the early morning silence, rousing the three healthy members of the Sanzo party to their feet, weapons drawn. Breaking out into the dawn light, all three froze on the spot at the scene before them.

Three men were in the middle of the field, waist deep in the dry grass. Two were slightly cowering, shrinking back in the face of the rage of the third. But that was not what drew the ikkou's attention. No, it was the men themselves who had brought Sanzo, Hakkai, and Gojyo to a halt, staring slack jawed at the trio in unabashed - and unnoticed - shock.

One, the one screaming at the top of his lungs in a rather familiar voice, had knee-length golden blonde hair, tied back but with shorter strands framing his currently red and angry face and interesting white robes hanging off his slim frame. Another, clad in what could only be described as a lab coat, was a very familiar face with glasses and long, shaggy hair, scratching the back of his head in what seemed to be apology. The third was the least recognizable, but still obvious nonetheless with short black hair, blue eyes, and a strange chakra on his brow. His outfit was the most interesting, black trimmed in gold and open at the chest, displaying a rather strange…was that a skull?

The blonde's voice rang out through the still morning, "Tenpou, you are a fucking idiot! What kind of shit do you keep on those shelves?! And why in the name of Tenkai would you be _climbing the shelf?_ Now, where the fucking hell are we? This shit is fucking ridiculous! Now the monkey is going to freak out because he was off picking flowers and is going to come back to find us gone. _You_ can deal with his blubbering when we get back, _Marshal_. Kami help me, I am going to kick both your asses for dragging me into this shit…"

"Ne, Konzen, calm down…" the man called Tenpou tried reasoning, waving his hands in a placating gesture that was almost identical to one of his currently frozen counterparts, "I can't imagine how this happened…but if I have no idea where we are…"

"Woah, woah…" the third man cut in, running a hand through already messy short hair, and making the three observers flinch in recognition of the third eerily identical voice, "How in the hell did we end up outside anyway? And why in the hell are you dragging me into this shit, blondie? I didn't do anything!"

Konzen scoffed, crossing silk covered arms over his chest, "He's your responsibility, so therefore it's your fault, Kenren."

"I'll remember that next time Goku messes up anything in the palace," Kenren replied, smirking and the narrowing of the blonde's eyes.

"Temee…"

Familiar green eyes locked with identical ones and froze, ignoring the bickering of his companions and blinking rapidly. His gaze shifted, taking in each of the three men slowly, his mouth hanging open. Kenren and Konzen had yet to notice their friend's inattention, until said friend stepped forward right in between them, still staring at the shocked Sanzo party a few dozen yards away. Even at a distance the resemblance was uncanny and obvious.

"Yo, babe, what's up?" Kenren asked uneasily, prodding his superior officer in the side.

In lieu of answering, Tenpou shot out his arms, grabbed both his companions by the backs of their necks and turned them to face their doubles, "…Friends, I really don't think we're in Tenkai anymore," Jaws dropped anew.

"Holy fucking…" Kenren started, tracing a familiar but changed face.

"Shit…" Gojyo finished, finally breaking free of the strange hold shock had had on him. He took a step forward and tilted his head.

Kenren just grinned, "I must say, you've gotta be the hottest guy I've ever seen outsidda my mirror, man!"

Gojyo grinned back, while both Konzen and Sanzo rolled their eyes. Tenpou was the first to break the silence in a useful way, "I must say, this is very strange…who are you all?"

Sanzo narrowed his eyes and leveled his gun towards the trio, "Why don't you answer that? What kind of a trick is this?"

Raising his eyebrows at his likeness, Konzen scoffed, "Like you can hurt us with that, idiot."

Sanzo's jaw clenched, and ever the mediator, Hakkai stepped in, "Maa maa, calm down. This is Sanzo, I am Hakkai, and my friend is Gojyo. Pleased to make your acquaintances…"

Kenren grinned and sauntered up to the brunette, "'Lo there, the name's General Kenren of the Western sect of Heaven's army. It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. My companions are Tenpou Gensui and the irritable Konzen Douji, all of which are charmed, I'm sure…"

Sanzo's reply was ignored from the side, "_More_ fucking gods. Great, just fucking perfect."

Hakkai laughed nervously, taking a wary step back, but was saved by a smiling Tenpou who grabbed Kenren's arm with an abnormally serious and clear look in his eyes, "This is…strange. I have a rather peculiar feeling by the situation we're in…Konzen? Could you call to your aunt? Perhaps she could enlighten us to this situation…"

The blonde growled and clenched his fist, "Kuso baba!"

In a flourish of flashing lights and dramatic smoke - the three deities all rolled their eyes - a familiar form to all the men appeared, smirking rather wickedly, "Konzen," she said, nodding to him, then turned and sought out Sanzo with her eyes, "Konzen II."

A rather prominent vein appeared in Sanzo's forehead, "Listen here you old hag…"

Konzen's vein was identical, "What in the hell is going on, damnit?"

An out of place look of melancholy settled over the Goddess' features, "You three are in the future. Please, meet your reincarnations."

Wide eyes greeted her, Tenpou recovering first, "Reincarnations?! How…"

The kami shook her head, her long ponytail swinging, "You can't know, boys. I'm sorry."

Konzen looked at the three men closely, lingering on the identical features of this 'Sanzo'. The man's scowl was his own, his eyes and hair - though shorter - his own, his body identical in height and build…

Sanzo stared right back, taking in the sight of what was supposedly himself. Where he had thought it some kind of trap or trick, though the woman was annoying as hell she didn't seem one to lie purposelessly. And what purpose would a lie like this serve?

The arrogance of the Merciful Goddess reappeared, "So, nephew…"

A loud gasp called all their attention to the tents at the ikkou's backs, and a wide-eyed teen who stood there, dumbstruck. Goku couldn't move, his eyes shifting from figure to figure. His eyes landed on Konzen, and tiny snippets of memory filtered through his mind behind his eyes, reliving short moments in a life he ha forgotten he'd had. His breath caught and he felt the world slipping away once more, "K-Konzen…"

----------

A/N: Poor Goku is being Mary Sue with all his fainting. -pets him- This is likely the last faint, though, I hope. sigh I know this is lame, but like I said, this isn't meant to be any _good_, just working out a kink in my creative energies. Sorry to subject you to this…

Should I even bother continuing to post? I need to know, lovies, so please review if you want me to keep writing…otherwise I'll just type it all out to get it outta my head and delete this. Pointless, it is, but hey,….


	3. Like a Stream that Meets a Boulder

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

Telling you all now, this will not be a Konzen/Goku, it will be a Sanzo/Goku. There will be Konzen/Goku affection, maybe a little suggestiveness…because Konzen's hot……but our favorite deities will not be around long enough for romance. Again, though, I reference the warning from the first chapter than there will be allusions to _past_ Konzen/Goku…disturing? A bit…but in the next chapter's A/N I'll give my views on it.

Again, how Konzen dies is not known…but the irony is appreciated by me, so I always use this.

----------

**For Good**

_Like a Stream That Meets a Boulder…_

----------

Before Goku had even hit the ground, it was surprisingly Konzen himself that had reacted. Despite the shock of added height and matured features…those eyes were all it would have ever taken him to recognize his charge. Still rather stunned by this turn of events, the blonde god raced forward and lifted the now lighter - due to the lack of binding shackles - Goku into his arms, turning to glare at the other men who were gawping at him stupidly, "Well? Do I have to deal with the saru by myself, or am I going to get some help?"

Despite his confusion, Hakkai moved quickly, running a hand over the teen's forehead and sighing in relief, "He's fine, I think the poison is out of his system, he's just shocked."

"No doubt he would be," Kanzeon said with a smirk, sashaying forward, "Seeing you would unlock his memories," she said slyly.

Sanzo growled and cocked his gun, "Kuso baba, what did you do to him?"

The Goddess scoffed, "Do? Nothing! Though, seeing as these boys told me about their adventure when they returned to their own time, I made sure when sealing young Goku's memories to leave a loophole that if he saw Konzen, the real Konzen and not you, that the seal could be broken."

"Why in the hell were his memories sealed in the first place, woman?!" Konzen yelled, still clutching the boy protectively to his chest. Gojyo and Hakkai watched the former incarnation of their leader in interest, seeing his interactions with the youngest member of their group. This Konzen was obviously much more open than their Sanzo, and they were getting more and more curious of him.

"Alas, fair mortal, a day shall dawn and still ye shall have no answer…" Tenpou quoted dreamily, staring at his upturned hands and getting strange looks from the rest of the men. Kanzeon Bosatsu just smirked.

"That's about it. I can't tell you guys anything about why you die, why Goku doesn't, or why you all meet up again…but I'll tell you right now everything is your own choices. Better ones couldn't have been made, boys."

Kenren raised a disbelieving eyebrow, "You sure about that one?"

Gojyo took his counterpart's side, "Yeah, I mean, how is it a _good_ choice that would make them end up no longer being gods, and instead sticking us with the shitty ass lives we lead now?"

"Perhaps a certain young man can answer your questions…" Kanzeon said mysteriously, "But for now, I have to go find a way to get you lot home. Have fun now, nephew, and take it easy on the rest of them, hm?" she said as she disappeared in an overly dramatic fashion.

"That explains why she always calls you Konzen, Sanzo…"

The blonde sneered, "I don't give a damn why she does anything, the stupid old bitch. I want to get back on the fucking road and forget any of this shit happened."

"Ano…Sanzo, I don't think that'll be happening right away…"

"Why is that?" Sanzo replied, his sneer deepening.

Gojyo took this time to look around, "Where in the hell is Hakuryu?"

And such was the question of the day.

--

"Thank you for coming with me, Goujun," the Goddess of Mercy smiled, patting the small dragon's head, "Now, let's give them all a bit of time to get to know one another before popping back in, hmm?"

--

When Goku finally began coming around, he moaned pitifully. His memories were not clear…it was so jumbled and messy…he remembered seeing a tall blonde…_Konzen_…and exclaiming over his beauty…pulling long strands. He remembered a messy brunet…_Ten-chan_…sitting within mounds of books, grinning in a carefree way at Goku's enthusiastic recital of a small book of his own. A tan man with black hair…_Ken-nii-chan_…smirking and telling soldiers Goku was his secret love child, laughing uproariously at the expressions this statement got him. He also vaguely remembered blood. Death. Pain. He shook his head to free himself from these.

He shifted, vaguely aware that he was lying in someone's lap. He breathed in deeply, trying to identify them…it wasn't Sanzo, but similar…lacking in stale cigarette smoke and gunpowder. Konzen, then. He moaned again and cracked his eyes open, peering up into veiled violet eyes.

"K-Konzen…" he gasped, his head aching from the memories he was still trying to assimilate.

"Hai," the familiar voice said softly, "Better now, saru?"

"I…I think…" he tried to sit up, but pain assaulted his temples, "My head…" he moaned, turning his face and burying it in the soft material of Konzen's top. Long fingers carded through his hair, relaxing the teen marginally. He risked cracking his eyes open once more but stayed lying down, "Where is everyone?" he asked softly.

"Their all near the fire…I thought it might end up too loud for you near there."

Goku smiled and wondered if Sanzo would ever be so considerate. The smile faded quickly. While both men had the same core personality, because of Sanzo's past he had shut himself off from the world…from affection. Konzen, though harsh and moody, had a soft side that he had found easily as a child, spending more days than he was sure Konzen would ever admit to curled in his guardian's lap while he did paperwork. His smiles happened more often, though small they were, and his tone softened often, though only for his charge.

Tenpou and Kenren, too. Neither had the horrors in their pasts that their current incarnations did, and were much more liable to truly laugh and smile, free of pensive moments or hidden pain. Again, their core personalities remained the same, but their lives had shaped them in far different ways.

It broke Goku's heart to know that somehow - he couldn't remember just how yet - these three men would die and their souls suffer. He couldn't ignore the nagging feeling in the back of his mind that is was his fault. He hoped it wasn't, but something told him it indeed was.

"Do you remember everything?" Konzen asked suddenly, making Goku jumped. He had gotten rather deep into his thoughts and practically forgot about the blonde.

"No…not really. I remember little things…mostly with you…boring days. Nice boring, though. I remember picnics…and you chasing me through the halls…destroying your paperwork," Konzen snorted rather loudly at this, "A big flower field…so many little moments. But…I can't…"

The fingers that were still playing with his wayward hair cupped his cheek, "Shh, don't push yourself. We shouldn't know anyway, I think. It could change something important."

Golden eyes glared up into amethyst, "How is that bad? Do you know how bad this life is?!"

"Of course not," Konzen scowled, a bit miffed at his charge's defiant attitude.

"I was stuck in a fucking mountain for five hundred years, without knowing why. Stuck in time, in the cold, in the dark…only seeing daylight but never the sun. Gojyo is a hanyou, and always given shit for it. His mom tried to kill him when he was little, just because of that, so he had to watch his brother kill her to save him. Hakkai killed a thousand demons to save the girl he loved, became a demon himself…but she killed herself in front of him. Sanzo…god Sanzo…" Goku's breathing hitched and he closed his eyes, "His master was killed in front of him…and he was out on his own for years. I don't know what he went through, but he's so…cold all the time. He's scared to even have a friend, because if he did he might get hurt again if he lost them," Golden eyes flew open and tears fell from them, "Oh no…oh gods no…"

"Goku?" Konzen said urgently, shaking the younger man slightly in response to the uncontrollable shaking that went through the teen.

"You bastard! You made me watch you die!" he screeched, pushing himself out of Konzen's lap and scooting away, tears still falling down his face. He had attracted the attention of the other five men, who had approached the frantic boy cautiously. Even Sanzo, usually so stoic, was tense as he tried not to go to the young man.

Golden eyes streamed with unnoticed tears, as he stared at Konzen in horror, "I don't know why you were fighting…all three of you…you wouldn't let me help…" Goku continued brokenly, his face twisted in grief, "What in the hell did you think you were doing, Konzen?! You can't fight, damnit! You didn't even have a weapon! Kenren and Tenpou fell so quickly against all those soldiers…no matter how good they were…there were just too many. I pulled your arm, 'Let's go, Konzen!' but you wouldn't listen to me! WHY wouldn't you listen?!"

Goku had begun to rock back and forth now, clutching his arms around himself as if he were cold, "You finally snapped out of it, grabbed my hand, and we were running, running, but you waited too long. They were right behind us. When they caught us, you threw me to the ground, you stupid bastard, and you let them _kill_ you! How was it better for me to live?! Huh?! I had to watch all three of you _die_ and you thought saving me would make it better? I would rather of _died!!!_"

All the onlookers were shocked at the venom in the earth spirit's voice, the narrowed golden eyes that actually showed their age. Finally, movement, as Sanzo stepped forward. He couldn't help himself. Out of anyone, he understood what his charge was going through now. It was like it had just happened to the monkey, since it was just remembered. Having felt the same emotions for more than a decade, he knew how hurt the young man was and simply went to his knees beside him and buried one hand in the russet hair, Goku immediately latching onto him and burying his face in his robe, "Why? How is this better? How can this much hurt for everybody be better?" he sobbed over and over, barely coherent.

Sanzo glared icily at the source of his pet's pain, the frozen and pale Konzen Douji. The man was swallowing repeatedly, as if his throat would close up if he didn't. He starred in unadulterated horror at his former charge, the idea of the hurt he would someday put the young man through drilling into him. Without a word, Sanzo scooped the sobbing simian into his arms and walked away from the stricken group of men, secluding himself with the monkey so he could risk being a bit less…harsh when the monkey calmed.

----------

A/N: Weird place to stop, I know, but this was already overly long. Oh well.

I am not happy with this chapter, but this was my fourth rewrite of it, and I give up. :P Next chapter is better. Hehehehehe…its far too fun to have both Gojyo and Kenren in the same place.

Since this story is just cliché crap, I post much more often than my other stories. My good ones I draw out a bit…but ones like this, what's the point really? ;P


	4. Halfway Through the Woods

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

----------

**For Good**

…_Halfway Through the Woods_

----------

The five men watched in silence as Sanzo carried Goku towards the tree line, all of the shifting uncomfortably. Numbly, they gravitated to the fire, where Hakkai busied himself in meal preparation as the others mused over the new information they had been given.

"Oh my…" Hakkai said softly, attracting the attention of the man nearest to him.

"'Sup, baby?" Kenren piped up, ignoring the other man's grimace at the 'pet name'.

"I was just noticing how low we are on supplies…and if we are not leaving after this meal, we will have very little for dinner. Well…I take that back. Since Goku is awake, we shall be without food at all, and he will still complain of his hunger."

Kenren glanced to Tenpou, who had his nose buried in a book Hakkai had let him read, humming thoughtfully. With a roll of blue eyes, he smirked at Hakkai, "Why don't I just phase on over to a town after lunch and pick up some supplies? I think Kanzeon set us up for all of us to be stuck here until she can get us three back to our own time."

The man-turned-youkai smiled thankfully, more than a little miffed that his previous incarnation seemed to be the _less_ practical of the duo. Though he had his moments of inanity, he knew that between he and Gojyo, he was always the level-headed one. It seemed his easy former life had made the man into a bit of an airhead.

Gojyo yawned and picked at his fingernails, "I wonder why you guys were fighting soldiers, if the monkey's memories are right…"

"I can't imagine why, since we're s'posed to _be_ some of those soldiers. Sure, I think my commanding officer is an ass, but I wouldn't revolt or nothing. And Tenpou is the best Field Marshal they got, and he's not nearly as rash as I am, so I can't see him being that dumb. Not to even start on Konzen…what in the hell could he have done?"

Tenpou, finally emerging from the book, frowned seriously, "As much as I hate to say it, but the only connection between us three is Goku-chan. You have seen how things have been going with young Nataku and Li Touten…perhaps they try to recruit Goku for another war prince?"

"Why in the hell would they do that? He's way too small for that shit, and practically harmless! They can get the Emperor's nephew...what was his name? Homer or some shit. They can get him to succeed Nataku. Goku's just a kid."

Hakkai frowned, "You all obviously have not encountered his true form then, I assume?"

Tenpou's serious green eyes locked with similar ones, "Seiten Taisei Son Goku. We have not, but I have read of the tales."

Kenren raised a brow, "What in the hell could the chibizaru do? I mean, I know they threw those frikkin' heavy shackles on him, but he can't be _that_ bad, can he?"

To answer, the hanyou of the group pushed up his sleeve, showing a still pink but fading scar wrapping around his wrist, "The little bitch bit me. He's stronger than anything I've ever seen. He's so fast, but vicious and fucking plays around like the deaths he inflicts are a game."

Both the gods paled as Gojyo continued describing their two encounters with the legendary sage and the close encounters with death wrought from them.

Konzen, who had been silently staring into the fire, forgotten, spoke up in a strangely soft voice, "Tell me about your lives. Both of you."

The two men halted in their conversations and stared at the blonde deity in shock, their mouths closed.

"Why in the hell should we, blondie?" Gojyo growled between his teeth.

Konzen turned his unnervingly open violet gaze on the two mostly-youkai, "Goku gave me the smallest hints to your lives…but I want to know. I have some ideas…some ideas that I need to figure out without the saru around. Its something you all can't let him know if I'm right."

So the next ten minutes were spent giving the gods a not overly detailed description of their lives, painfully. Neither man liked speaking of their pasts in the slightest, but something in Konzen's eyes made them relate it all to them. When finished, Konzen had closed his eyes for several minutes, "I'm going to go tell the monk and the monkey that food is done," he said without another word, stalking off where the other two had disappeared to.

"What the fuck was all that?" Gojyo erupted, "He makes us tell him that shit then leaves?!"

"Konzen's got a reason for everything, man. He'll tell us when his pretty boy ass is ready to."

So the four lapsed into silence, picking at their lunch.

--

Upon reaching the sparse copse, Sanzo settled with his back against a tree and Goku in his lap. He offered no false comfort or soothing words, he simply let the monkey cling to him and cry himself out. He remembered having to do this often in the early days back after the boy's release from his mountain prison, but since the nightmares had died out, so had he need for such comfort. Strangely, Sanzo found himself glad for the closeness with his charge, as if he had been missing it.

Several long minutes passed with the boy sniffling occasionally, fingers in a death grin on the collar of Sanzo's robes and his face buried under his chin. One long-fingered hand was still tangled in the brunet's messy hair, offering support silently.

It was a long time before the younger of the two men sighed, "How…how do you live knowing someone died for you?" he asked bluntly, barely above a whisper.

Sanzo clenched his jaw at the question. How did one live after that? He had been wondering it himself for years now. Originally upon leaving his childhood home, he had chosen his gun for the simple fact that it was the perfect size to end his own life. But…revenge had fueled him, along with the knowledge that his Master would have wished him alive.

He sighed silently, looking down at messy russet locks, "You just do."

Goku laughed humorlessly, pushing his face further into Sanzo's robed chest, "You know…it feels like it just happened. It wouldn't be so bad if I'd of always known…but this is so much to take in at once, ya know? Konzen meant a whole lot to me back then, I know now…he was my entire world."

Sanzo frowned in displeasure, unsure why those words made him wish to run and strangle the life out of his previous self. The monkey didn't notice, and just twisted one of Sanzo's sleeves as he spoke.

"But, now I have you. Yeah, it hurts to know Konzen died to save me an' all…but…" the young man trailed off clenching his eyes shut.

"But?" Sanzo prompted, knowing this all had to be gotten out before the younger man would calm down.

"But…you mean way more to me than Konzen ever did. I mean, he was great and all, but I was with him for less than two years, and I've already been with you for six. But, since I just now found out…I keep seeing it as you instead of him, and it scares me so much," the boy choked out, shaking a bit in the monk's arms.

Sanzo closed his eyes, "Like I'd ever do something that stupid," he chided in a rougher than usual voice.

This only caused the simian in his lap to giggle lightly, finally raising bright golden eyes to meet amethyst, "Yeah, you're right. Sorry Sanzo."

The older man smirked in reply, still with his eyes closed. Goku was suddenly _very_ aware of their proximity, and how warm Sanzo was beneath him. Heat stained his cheeks pink and he fought to move away before he did something incredibly stupid when it happened. The throbbing which hadn't entirely died away in his temples increased for just a moment, but with it a scene played behind his eyes.

Sanzo, hearing the harsh intake of his ward's breath, opened his eyes to see the monkey staring into nothing for several long seconds. When awareness came back to the brunet, he met eyes with Sanzo and promptly turned the darkest crimson Sanzo had ever seen the boy blush and darted from his lap, eyes wide and panicked.

A blonde brow rose, "What?"

Goku only squeaked and turned even redder.

Violet eyes narrowed and he rose to his feet, "What's your problem, bakazaru?"

Several deep breaths later, the deep red had tamed to a dark pink and the boy was chewing his lip, "Uh, well, I umm…"

At that moment, Konzen entered the clearing, making all color drain from Goku's face - quite a feat at the moment - and made the young man dart past them both at full speed. Konzen turned troubled and confused eyes on his reincarnation, who only shrugged, "Hell if I know."

----------


	5. Who Can Say

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

Jealousy is a fun plot device. Therefore, I am allowing one Konzen/Goku kiss. -grin-

I was able to rescue Complementary and For Good from my HD before the battery died out! So, updates for them. My Inu readers are shit ut of luck, but who cares? LOL. YAY!

----------

**For Good**

_Who Can Say…_

----------

Goku sprinted back to camp, his mind whirling. What timing for a memory like _that_ to present itself. _Hands, not small per say, but smaller than he was used to associating with himself stroked impossibly long golden silk strands, toying with the ends playfully. He was perched in Konzen's lap for the second time that week, amusing himself with his master's hair as the man concentrated on work. Konzen said he only allowed it because it was one of the few times he could get the boy to be quiet. Goku tugged the hair lightly, a playful grin on his face as he waited for his sun's attention to fall on him._

_When it did, the preteen gave his guardian no time to react before stretching up and planting a not-so-innocent kiss on his lips, one of his hands holding the older man to him while the older kept its hold on golden strands. Konzen seemed stunned for all of two seconds before breaking the kiss and glaring, "What in the hell did I tell you about that, bakazaru?!"_

_Goku glared, "You said not to do it, but Ken-nii-chan said you do it if you love someone! And I love you, so I'm gonna do it all the time."_

_The red faced deity scowled, "You're too young for this shit, like I told you the last four times you tried it."_

_"Ne, but Konzennn, you said you loved me! Why won't you kiss me? Ne? Ne? Ne?"_

_The blonde smacked a hand to his own face, sighing, "Because you're not ready, baka! Now shut up and let me work, and don't try that shit again!"_

_Goku nodded in fake remorse, but inside was grinning and plotting the next time he'd take the older man by surprise. He'd even gotten him to kiss back for a second once, after all, so he couldn't be a 'lost cause' like Ken-nii-chan said. So Goku just waited for the next opportunity._

It hadn't been much, but he had been _twelve_ for gods sake! He flopped down by the fire, barely acknowledging anyone around him as he accepted his food and stuffed it down his throat, sadly aware of his two missed meals. Hakkai blinked several times when Goku returned to camp, his demeanor screaming something amiss.

"Is anything wrong, Goku?" Hakkai asked in his motherly way, making Goku's blush rise higher.

"Nothing's wrong!!!"

Kenren and Gojyo, who had begun talking in low tones, both looked up with mischievous smiles, "Oi, saru, what's with the new look? Red don't go with your eyes so well," Gojyo quipped.

"I just wonder what brought it about…" Kenren drawled, seeing the nervous shifting of the youngest in the group.

"NOTHING!" Goku denied loudly, screaming his lie.

"Tsk tsk, what do you always say about secrets, silly monkey?"

Kenren's eyes suddenly lit up, "Hey, chibi…did your memories all come back at once, or are ya just gettin' them back slowly?"

He knew he had hit pay dirt when the flush darkened to puce, but it was Tenpou's voice that cut him off, "Which time did you remember, Goku-chan?" the Marshal chirped, peeking over his book.

Gold eyes suddenly snapped to the jacketed brunet, "Woah woah, are you saying you knew?

"Well duh," Kenren answered for them both, leering at the young man, "You walked in on me and Tenpou, and I just _knew_ you were impressionable enough for my idea to work…who do you think told you to do it in the first place?"

Goku glared heatedly, "Oi, Ken-nii-chan, that's so…so…wrong, though!"

An eyebrow raised, "Why?"

"Cuz…cuz I was a kid!"

Blue eyes rolled, "Not like I told you to jump on him naked or anything…"

Goku had to admit this was true, but still refused to believe he had initiated such things knowingly. Sure, it wasn't like it had ever gone anywhere…but he had been under the impression until a few minutes ago that his entire sexual history was confined to his hand. No matter how limited the reactions from Konzen had been, the thoughts behind the kisses were more than childish innocence. They hadn't been…sexual necessarily, but it had been a lot closer to it than it appeared on the outside.

By now, both Gojyo and Hakkai were staring round eyed. It was Gojyo to brave the question, "M-Mind cluing us in, bro?"

Kenren merely laughed as Goku turned redder. Tenpou set down his book for the first time since it had been given to him and smirked a bit evilly, "My friend here convinced Goku-chan that he should kiss Konzen because he loved him. After the first time though, it was all his own idea, no matter what he might say."

At that moment, Konzen and Sanzo arrived, making the monkey choke on his food and turn away. Hakkai was still in shock, but this made both the hentai incarnations laugh uproariously, Gojyo now just seeing this as another reason to tease his favorite monkey. Konzen raised an eyebrow at the two, "What the fuck is so funny?"

Goku's eyes widened and he waved his hands at the two lechers, who ignored him easily. It was Gojyo who responded, "Apparently, Konzen-_sama_," he mocked, easily treating the god like Sanzo, "The monkey just recovered a new set of memories."

Twin sets of violet eyes narrowed on the varying expressions of their companions, "So?" Sanzo said, his eyebrow twitching, "This is funny, why?"

Goku, recovering his breath, shook his head wildly, "NOTHING!"

Eyeing his charge, Sanzo was a bit dumbfounded about the last few minutes and admitted intense curiosity as to why his charge was acting this way. Konzen, on the other hand, seemed to figure it all out by the violence of the boy's reactions and blushed as well, not darkly but it seemed so against his pale skin. Sanzo looked back and forth between the two blushing men, then raised an eyebrow at the other four.

"Don't you tell him, you ero bastards!" Goku screeched, his entire body a deep red at this point.

Sanzo whacked the young man hard with his fan, shutting him up and glaring, "What the fuck is such a big deal that you're going to keep a secret from _me_, bakazaru?"

Konzen had inched as far away from the group as he could, still redfaced and tightlipped. Hakkai was pink himself, busying himself in going through a bag to avoid the scene. Gojyo was laughing too hard to answer, so it was a smirking Kenren who spoke up, "Chibi-chan is just upset because he found out he used to make a game outta kissing blondie over there," he said, jerking a thumb in Konzen's mortified direction.

Sanzo glowered at his charge, who was hiding his head from his master and whimpering. But the scowl didn't stay on him long…no, Sanzo whipped around and stomped towards his previous incarnation, glaring harshly, "What the fuck did you do to my monkey?"

All sound in the clearing stopped, wide eyes on the monk. He didn't even seem aware of his use of the possessive pronoun. He met eyes so like his own fiercely and clenched his fists as Konzen glared right back, "For one thing, he's _my_ monkey, and two, I didn't do anything to him."

Goku gulped as he watched his guardians, both former and current, face off heatedly. Neither looked ready to back down, "No, he isn't. You went and got your dumb ass killed, so he's my responsibility now."

"He was mine then, and since I am _not_ dead right now, he's still mine."

"You're nothing but a fucking echo of the past, you stupid prick, and he is _not_ yours!"

Goku couldn't take it anymore and leapt to his feet, running between the two, "Stop! Just stop it!" he yelled, eyes clenched shut.

Konzen's eyes immediately softened, but Sanzo's glare only became more pronounced, "Are you sticking up for this ass now?"

Goku turned hard gold eyes on the shorter-haired blonde, "Didn't I just tell you earlier that you're more damn important to me, Sanzo? I told you, I loved Konzen a whole lot, but I've been through more with you than I ever did back then! Are you jealous, or do you just like fighting?!"

Konzen turned his back, but his posture was rigid in his pain. For the first time since he was a child, he felt tears sting the backs of his eyes. He knew he wouldn't actually cry, but the fact that such words had hit him so deeply perturbed him. Did he really give so much of a damn about the monkey that hearing there was someone who meant more to him would hurt so much? Even though said person was, in all technicalities, himself?

Sanzo was shaking with rage, "Jealous? Why the fuck would I be jealous? I don't give a rat's ass what you do, you stupid shit, but you're still my responsibility and I have to watch you anyway!"

Hurt flashed through Goku's eyes, but was quickly replaced by shock as he was spun around, eyes falling on the white, draping silk of Konzen's robe, "Well then, _Sanzo_," the god said calmly, ice underlying his words, "You won't care if I do this."

In a fit of what he would later claim as insanity, Konzen grabbed his now grown charge and kissed him full on the mouth, leaving two sets of green eyes, one red, one blue, and one violet wide in utter shock.

----------

A/N: Sorry, but Konzen is hot. I couldn't help it. It's not going to go anywhere, obviously, because they are leaving in chapter 9. And besides, Goku and Sanzo beloooonnnngggg together! I'm just letting Konzen have one kiss, since he dies before Goku's ever old enough.

**Anime Moments with Rayvn (again):**

Ray: Mom, I want a soda and to watch a Saiyuki with Kougaiji now.

Me: (-writing and three year olds don't need soda-) I don't care what you want, no.

Ray: But Mom, **_Kougaiji!_**

Me: Again, don't care.

Ray: Hey! But you're _s'posed_ to care, mom.

Me: …

Ray: (-picks up her barbies she named after Hakkai and Sanzo-) Hakkai, Mommie doesn't care, you should beat her up!

Me: (-sweat drop-)

:P That just happened, as I finished the last chapter to this arc in the story. :P


	6. If I've Been Changed for the Better

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

----------

**For Good**

…_If I've Been Changed For the Better_

----------

Goku was completely stunned. There was no other description for it. His eyes, usually round and large anyway, were the size of saucers and his body was stiff as the long haired man kissed him hard. Had it not been for the emotions Goku could practically feel…hurt, love, regret, apology…pouring from the man, he might not have done anything. But he could feel them, and so for just a moment he returned the kiss, nipping the older man's lip in remorse and tasting it with a flick of his tongue before pulling away, his face red but his eyes sad.

He tried to communicate his feelings without words, and it seemed the deity understood, for he smiled sadly and turned away again, walking to the fire without looking back. Goku sighed and turned to face his current guardian's fury. Goku knew the situation was bad the second he laid eyes on Sanzo, because he was completely expressionless.

Goku gulped, "S-Sanzo?"

Furious amethyst eyes shot to his face, but he didn't say a word. He just stared accusingly at the younger man, making Goku want to cry out. But he did not. He just stared silently at the man who meant the world to him, hoping he would not hate him for this.

Because Goku loved Sanzo, more than anything else in existence. He loved him as his savior, as his sun, and for the last year and a half, even more. Yes, he had once loved Konzen, and the feelings were overwhelming in their strength now that he was recovering them, but he knew without a doubt that he loved Sanzo more. His love for the monk was borne of years of observation and attraction, of care and understanding.

Watching the war in his guardian's eyes, Goku bit his lip and implored in a whisper, "You'll always be more important, Sanzo," and without waiting for response, he turned and headed to the fire himself, picking up the remnants of his lunch.

"Oi…wait a minute," Gojyo suddenly blurted, turning wide eyes on his previous incarnation, "What did you mean 'walked in on' you and Tenpou?"

--

An hour later, camp was quiet. Kenren and Konzen had gone to a nearby town for supplies (Konzen replacing Hakkai, since Gojyo now refused to let him be alone with the General), Gojyo and Hakkai were trying to locate a stream to clean their dishes and cooking supplies as well as work out their embarrassment at their past life relationship, Tenpou kept reading and exclaiming randomly, and Goku munched on leftovers, trying not to wonder where Sanzo had gone.

The past hours had been filled with confusion and pain, and Goku was slowly remembering bits and pieces more. He remembered a boy with golden eyes much like his own and black hair, promising to show him a multitude of fabulous things. _Nataku…_ He wondered what had happened to him. He was pretty sure _he_ hadn't died…so why hadn't he come to see him?

He remembered some things surrounding the deaths of his companions, too…but his understanding of them was minimal, having been a barely more than a child at the time. Most strange was remembering _before _Konzen, a time before his limiter when he still lived in peace. He hadn't been…well, crazy in that form then. He had wandered to villages, picked flowers, and played in streams happily. Why had they put on the limiter and seemingly made him half a person? It made so little sense…to make a beast out of a child.

Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted by a dramatic flash, much more than the regular one made when Kenren, Konzen, or Tenpou moved around. Said brunet had dozed off on top of his book, his body half hidden and completely oblivious. Goku, on the other hand, jumped to his feet and summoned Nyoi-bou with narrowed eyes.

"Son Goku," the handsome visitor purred, smirking at the young heretic, "We meet again. Alone, I see?"

Goku, usually excited at the prospect of a fight with the powerful Toushin Taishi, was decidedly not in the mood, "What do you want, Homura?"

The eyebrow above the man's golden eye raised, "Not happy to see me this day?"

Twin golden eyes rolled, "Not really."

"Then, shall we?"

The man's sword was out in a moment to block the blow from Goku's staff, pushing back against it and aiming a hard hook at the boy's cheek. Goku dodged agilely and crouched, sweeping the staff in a smooth arc under the feet of the kami.

Homura jumped over the red bar, grinning as Goku leapt at him again, the staff separating into sections and the boy using them expertly to beat him about the torso. The fight was broken by a gunshot and stomping, as Sanzo stormed over.

"You fucking shithead, what are you doing here? You aren't getting the scriptures!"

Homura smirked cockily, "I wasn't asking for them, Konzen. Son Goku will bring them to me on his own."

"Yeah right! And he's _not_ Konzen, same soul or not!" Goku yelled, crossing his arms over his chest and staring hard at the now slightly bewildered heretic kami.

"Yeah well, just get out of here. I cannot put up with another fucking god right now…"

As if summoned by his rant, a muted flash occurred, and with it both the absent shoppers. Neither seemed to notice the confrontation and set their things down, Konzen more moodily and crossed his arms while glaring at the laughing Kenren. Homura was in shock at this point, his jaw hanging open in a terrible moment of impropriety.

Suddenly, both deities spotted the raven haired god and raised an eyebrow. Tenpou, too, was stirring at this point and yawned before seeing the situation and sitting up, instantly in his role as Marshal. He had heard already of the recent problems the ikkou had been having with the new War Price, and strolled briskly up to him, eyeing him with narrowed emeralds, "Just what is your business in the Lower World, Homura Taishi?"

Homura recovered his decorum and sneered at the kami, "If it isn't the _real_ Tenpou Gensui. I have no idea how the three of you have come to be here, but I have no quarrel with you or yours. It is your reincarnations that stand in my way."

"In your way to what?" Kenren asked, drawing his long pistol and nonchalantly picking at it.

Homura's sneer became cocky, "Son Goku, of course. I will have him for my perfect world."

Konzen's violet eyes lit with challenge as he strode forward, the war god giving the blonde his full mocking attention. Konzen cocked his head and smirked back, but gave Homura no time to contemplate what he was about to do as he punched him in the face - hard enough to knock the War Prince off his feet.

"Damn that felt nice," Konzen mumbled, shaking his hand slightly as the taboo heretic stood back to his feet and glared. From the trees, Hakkai and Gojyo emerged, immediately dropping into defensive positions. Homura ignored them and strode for Konzen.

Goku was in front of Konzen in a minute, blocking Homura from retaliation, "You have to go through me!"

"So loyal, Son Goku," Homura cooed, smiling at the boy and trailing his eyes over him, "No matter. Your little friends will be gone soon, and I will have you. Rest assured. And you, Konzen, are nothing but this," he flicked a wrist at Sanzo's fuming visage, "now, so you can act however you wish."

Tenpou drew his sword, locking eyes with Homura, "When the Jade Emperor gets word of your undertakings, you will be executed. If I was still I charge of my men…"

"But you aren't," Homura mocked, "And you know nothing of the current situation in Tenkai. No one will do anything, because they don't care. By the time they notice, it will be far too late for any of them, and I will have my utopia."

Homura smiled at Goku again, ignoring the growls from multiple members of the group, "Until next time, my fellow child of heresy."

--

Dinner was a quiet thing, and after eating Goku left them all, saying he needed to run off some energy. The lack of youkai activity and his shortened fight with Homura had made him desperately bored. As soon as he was out of sight, Konzen cleared his throat, calling all the attention to him, "I do not know when I will get any other chance without the saru around, so I will speak now. What I am to say to you should not be shared with him…"

Sanzo growled, "Keeping things from him?"

"Yes. Don't be contrary for the sake of it. This is important."

The others focused on the blonde deity, who ran his fingers through the strands of hair framing his face and sighed, "I am still unaware of the circumstances of our deaths, but that is for the best. However, I do know why we choose to die."

----------


	7. I Do Believe

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

----------

**For Good**

_I Do Believe…_

----------

Tenpou and Kenren clenched their jaws and watched their friend look for the words, "As at least my two companions know, heretical beings are immortal beings as we gods are, though looked down upon. However, unlike gods, heretics are not reincarnated. Ever. As far as the gods are concerned, heretics should not exist in the first place, and therefore are extinguished once they have outlived their use.

"I think…I think we chose death in order to keep him from death. From what I have heard from Goku and yourselves, it fits. The trials in each of your lives lines up eerily with Goku's own…"

Hakkai broke in, now pale in understanding, "It would kill him to know he is the reason. Even if freely chosen…"

"What in the hell are you talking about?" Sanzo interrupted, glaring heatedly.

Ignoring the other blonde completely, Konzen continued with a nod, "Exactly. You, Hakkai, were changed from what you once were when you slaughtered the youkai who had captured your sister, much as being limited was forced upon Goku. You killed to protect the one you loved, as I am sure Goku did…will," he said softly, shutting his eyes.

Hakkai was near hyperventilation, and Gojyo put an arm around him in comfort. Things were clicking into place for the hanyou, and his mouth was dry as he tried to speak, "T-Then, I'm a half-breed because…"

"You are now looked down on in this world as Goku was in heaven. An abomination, an expendable being. Mocked by the traits that label you as such, namely your hair and eyes."

Gojyo's eyes closed and he leaned his forehead against his best friend's shoulder. He had chosen this for himself. He had chosen a life of pain and misery.

Konzen plowed on, facing the toughest of them all, "And you, Sanzo. I am sure you can see what is the same for you."

Sanzo merely nodded, almost transparent in his paleness and no longer able to argue. Konzen steepled long fingers and watched the fire, "I am sorry you all have to go through this, but it truly is…for the better."

Hakkai watched both Kenren and Tenpou nod resolutely. Gojyo's hackles were raised though, "How can you say that? None of you have to live this life!!!" All three looked at him incredulously, until the redhead looked away in annoyance, "I mean, literally. This life is total shit. What's so good about the monkey to make you all willingly take this on, knowing?"

It was Tenpou who responded, smiling lightly, "Would you really rather us have retained our immortality, our boring, meaningless lives, and let young Goku-chan suffer then die, never to be born again? In our long lifetimes, the centuries just stretched on, senselessly. Then, over a year ago now, Goku came into Konzen's life. I had known him for quite some time, though never closely…but the changes were obvious. Goku brought light to his eyes even when it was in anger, made him smile, made everyone who could look past his shackles and eyes smile.

"Unfortunately, the people that includes is just us three, and perhaps Konzen's auntie when she is entertained. But to the three of us…he became something worthwhile. He wasn't petty politics or arrogant gods…he was genuine and cared for us as we were, gave light and smiles to our lives. I know we will come back, but he would not if we let him die. Then we would be back to the mundane and depressing lives we lived before, but worse since we knew how it could be."

Gojyo smiled a bit at the previous incarnation of his best friend, "You're real smart when you aren't off in the clouds, ya know that?"

Tenpou raised an eyebrow, "Of course I do."

Hakkai smiled at the group, though sadly, "I agree with your decision. In fact…this makes this life somehow easier to live, knowing my pain was a sacrifice rather than fate deciding I was out of favor."

Gojyo nodded slowly, "I have'ta agree. At least I'm still pretty though. It would have sucked if I was made as ugly as the chimp in retaliation."

Kenren snickered behind his hand, "Trust me man, you and I both."

The two silent blondes were turned to now, Konzen staring pensively into the fire as Sanzo hid a tense jaw and barely noticeable shaking hands. Konzen spoke softly, "I would choose it even if I have to take on all the pain myself. There's no way I could have lived with myself if not."

Kenren and Tenpou smiled knowingly at their friend, but Hakkai and Gojyo's attention was on their leader. Sanzo's eyes were deadened and the shaking had left, leaving the man slumped in defeat. In truth, the blonde was just tired of arguing with himself. Part of him wanted to rage and scream, beat both Konzen and Goku into the ground for what they had done, for the death of Koumyo Sanzo. The rest of him realized why, and tried to imagine where he would be if he had never heard a voice, if he hadn't pulled Goku out of his prison.

At the time he had been the closest to killing himself that he had ever gotten, even in the very beginning. He was scarred and battered, defeated and worn. He had journeyed for years and found nothing, and he had been utterly sick and tired of bothering anymore. Then, Goku. Annoying as hell, loud, hyper, cheerful, and bouncy…he had been like a godsend. '_Oh the irony of that statement now…'_ Sanzo thought irritably. He understood what the Marshal had meant by Goku bringing meaning…because he did. He brought anger that wasn't fatal, annoyance, amusement, even short moments of tenderness. To have someone that looked up to you as if you hung the moon…or were the sun, as the case may be…it was a beautiful thing. And Sanzo knew this.

But it hurt…oh kami it hurt. To know that the events of that night so long ago had been predetermined…that he couldn't have stopped even if he had been strong enough. It cut out a part of him, tore at his very soul. He wished for the first time in a decade that he had it in him to cry. Just to release the pain he was currently feeling, he would be happy to.

And suddenly, he realized everyone's attention was off to the distance where Goku walked back, dragging his feet. He had obviously tired himself out. Without permission, Sanzo's body rose from his spot and walked to meet the boy who was bathed in the last rays of the setting sun, making him glow the gold that Sanzo eternally associated with the boy.

The earth spirit looked surprised, but smiled wanly at Sanzo, hoping he wasn't about to get a beating. Instead, a hand raised up and twined in russet locks, making Goku blink rapidly, "S-Sanzo?"

"Nanda?"

"I mean…why?"

The monk shrugged and withdrew his hand, walking off and lighting a cigarette as he went, "Do I always need a reason?"

Goku's eyes shimmered as they met with the casual glance his guardian threw over his shoulder. A smile stretched across his face and he shook his head, running back to the others in a new burst of energy and flopping down.

"Ne, Hakkai?" he asked.

"Yes, Goku?"

"Harahetta."

So many jewel toned eyes rolled.

----------


	8. I Have Been Changed for the Better

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

----------

**For Good**

…_I Have Been Changed For the Better…_

----------

Kenren doubled over, sweat running from his temples and gawking at the young man crouched on the ground across from him. Goku only smirked confidently back at him, catlike in his grin and stance. He knew both his friends would be gaping with him at the moment, taking in the powerful young man that he had nonchalantly challenged to spar.

Oh boy how Goku had grown. All three of them were shocked at the strength and grace the younger man held now, the tightly controlled dips and spins of his staff, the high jumps and the utter _power_ behind his punches. The Goku they knew had never touched a living soul in malice before, as far as they knew. This Goku though…this Goku was a trained fighter, powerful and wild, but still somehow retaining the childish innocence that radiated off his very aura. Kenren would bet that the boy could murder, rape, and pillage and still retain the same glow of youth and naiveté.

"Well damn, monkey, you've become quite the challenge!" Kenren exclaimed, heaving himself to his feet and running the back of his hand across his forehead, "You make me feel old!"

Goku just laughed, his feline demeanor gone in an instant as the bubbly child returned, bounding around to talk to everyone.

Kenren just shook his head and yanked off his top in the cooling night air, catching eyes with his reincarnation and grinning, "Hey man, wanna show me where the water is around here?"

Gojyo whined as he stood, thoroughly put out to be stuck playing tour guide and leaving his comfy spot. Lighting a cigarette, he cracked his back and led the black haired man away, the two's laugher reverberating through the field they were encamped beside. 1

As the two perverted members of the group left, Goku found himself in the wide space in between the two blondes, looking back and forth at both thoughtfully scowling men. He sighed loudly and rested his chin in his hands, "Mou, it's too _quiet_!"

"It would be if you would shut up, bakazaru," both Konzen and Sanzo mumbled at the same time, then turned to glare at one another for the infraction. Goku only giggled behind his hand at them.

"I don't know why you guys think you have to fight, you'd get along great!"

Hakkai smiled and placed a finger on the book he was reading by firelight, "I think, Goku, that they would in fact kill one another. I wouldn't hold much hope."

"Great minds think alike and like minds think slightly…" Tenpou murmured dreamily, not ever glancing up from the book he was stuck in - his second today. That changed when he suddenly jumped up and glanced around, like his inane statement had triggered something in his mind, before going out in the direction the twosome had left towards minutes before. Hakkai watched him go with confusion.

Goku grumbled discontentedly. He hated the fighting…he knew Konzen and the others would leave soon, and he'd never see them again. Why did Sanzo have to make it so hard for him to spend even a moment in his former guardian's company? He felt like he was betraying Sanzo by doing it, but he wished so badly to spend just a few minutes in Konzen's lap again with fingers playing with his hair…a chance to tell the god what he could never articulate as a child, the fierce thankfulness for everything he had done, the awe and affection…everything.

But Sanzo remained glowering. He was beautiful right now in the firelight, smoking indolently with his robes shrugged to his waist. The tiny breeze flicked at his golden hair, only making him look more alive. But the angry looks he kept tossing his previous self…

Konzen, too, looked ethereal. His long hair was unbound for the moment as he arched his head back, shaking out the impossibly long strands and rubbing his scalp. Farther away from the fire as he was, his white robes and cream pants glowed while the moonlight sparkled off his hair, lending to the angelic appearance.

Goku sniffled pitifully, his eyes dull. Why did they have to go? How was it right that he just got to know who they were, just got to lay eyes on them for the first time in over five hundred years…and now they would leave, never to be seen again.

'_No…'_ his mind supplied images of his current companions, '_Never really gone…'_

But it was not quite the same. The men were not carbon copies of one another, even in looks. Their lives had shaped everything about them, from the cut of their hair to the scars (or lack thereof) to their defense mechanisms to their demeanor. They were the same inside…but so different at the same time. He mourned for the loss of Kenren, Tenpou, and Konzen even as he had Sanzo, Gojyo, and Hakkai beside him. It was just the way it was.

A tear traversed sluggishly down his cheek unnoticed; he was lost in the fire and in his thoughts. The tear did not go unnoticed by his divine guardian though, who grimaced and stood, walking the few feet to his charge and sitting behind him, not caring what his reincarnation had to say, and pulling the boy into his lap.

Goku immediately turned around completely, straddling him and nuzzling into the silk covering the lean body. Arms wrapped tightly around Konzen's torso and the young man began to sob, even breathing painful for him. He had cried more in the last day than he had since the journey had begun…it was really pitiful, but he couldn't help himself. It was all so overwhelming, to both find and lose loved ones all at once. He had found his family, the ones who had been beside him before even he remembered…only to find out they were already dead. His time with them limited to how long it took an errant goddess to reverse what had brought them here.

So he cried. He cried for Konzen, who wouldn't ever get to make his perfect corners anymore. He cried for Tenpou, whose library was but a memory now. He cried for Kenren, whose sakura tree was likely occupied by someone else. But mostly, he cried for himself. He cried for the young Goku who was back in time waiting for these men to return, and who would have precious little time left with them before their time together came to a messy and violent end. He wept for the five hundred years he would spend in an empty world where he knew of no one but himself. He cried for himself now, discovering the life he'd lost only to lost its anchors.

Konzen trailed fingers up and down Goku's back softly, his teeth clenched tight against the pain. He could almost feel the thoughts of the smaller figure in his arms, the bone jarring heart wracking loss of something so recently found. So he held the boy tightly, his nose buried in chestnut hair just above the golden diadem and rocked them ever so slightly. He kissed the heretic's ear and temple and cheek, telling him he understood, that it hurt him too.

Sanzo was really trying not to be jealous. He was really, _really_ trying. …But it wasn't working. He had been poised to make a remark when his previous incarnation had approached the saru, but then he'd heard Goku's heartbroken wail and seen the way he clung to the god like he would disappear if he let go. And he just might. And so, Sanzo held his tongue and tried to ignore the burning pain seeing Goku wrapped up in another man's arms.

He wasn't an idiot. He had realized months ago just how badly he'd failed in his mission to never care about anyone else. Goku had wormed and annoyed his way right through the ice encasing his heart and staked a claim, not letting go for anything. But Sanzo honestly didn't know what the feelings were. He couldn't help but feel they were perhaps less platonic than he'd been telling himself, since at the moment he wanted to rip the teen from the other man and hold him himself.

Sanzo wanted to beat his head against something. Gods, was he ever an idiot.

----------

A/N: I've decided this will be two separate stories, this one 10 chapters, the next one 5 maybe. This one was mostly Goku-centric and understanding where Goku and Sanzo stand…the next will be the stopping of the pussyfooting around it. Still cliché, but I decided to make it two separate stories just because they were really quite different, and I wanna use a different song from the same play for chapter titles on the Sanzo/Goku bit…because For Good fits better for the Gaiden boys.

1 I'll be putting up a far too interesting and silly oneshot to coincide with these two's trip to the water…short and kinda squicky but fun nonetheless….total crack!piece. Focus on the Tenpou/Kenren relationship, and -gasp- a bit 'o Kenren/Gojyo action?! -snickers- You'll have to see. Look for it!


	9. Because I Knew You

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah. The little centerized quote is from the same. There wouldn't be enough chapter titles to insert bits of this verse, and it fit's the presentGoku/Gaidenboys relationship nicely.

----------

**For Good**

…_Because I Knew You…_

----------

_It well may be that we will never meet again_

_In this lifetime, so let me say before we part_

_So much of me is made of what I learned from you_

_You'll be with me like a handprint on my heart_

_And now whatever way my story ends_

_I know you have rewritten mine by being my friend…_

"Oi, saru, pass the rice," Kenren called, holding out his hand the next morning at breakfast.

Goku glared and roughly shoved the bowl into the beaten General's hand; for some reason he had come back the night before with a fidgety Gojyo, a smug Tenpou, and a black eye. Goku didn't bother asking since he was sure he didn't want to know.

Right now, a more important question was plaguing him, "Why in fuck's name did 'monkey' carry over through lifetimes, of all things?!"

"Because you are one," both blondes and both perverts said in unison, smirking at one another as Hakkai sighed and chided 'Language!' in a defeated tone.

"Ch'," Sanzo intoned around his dangling cigarette, "I knew from the moment I laid eyes on you that you were nothing but a loud ass monkey."

"Me too," Konzen groaned.

"Yep, same here," Kenren smirked.

"Hai, hai," Gojyo said, his smirk eerily identical.

Goku growled and contemplated throwing the remainder of his sticky rice at them all…but that would be sacrilege. He clutched his bowl tighter for even having let the thought cross his mind.

"When are we fucking leaving?" Sanzo huffed, snuffing out the butt and glaring at his driver.

Hakkai smiled awkwardly, "Well, I can only assume that your aunt -" dismayed coughing sounded and Hakkai's smile turned knowing, "_Konzen's_ aunt took away Hakuryu in order to keep us here…we could walk…"

"Oh hell no!" Gojyo cried, "There's a damned road outta here, why walk when we don't have to? Isn't there some fucking mountain range coming up? Hell if I'm gonna walk before then…." he moaned, burying his face in his hands.

Sanzo, though he hated to admit it, felt the same. He merely sulked moodily and glared at the group, "Well, that old hag's ass better get down here and take you all home soon, because this journey isn't going to wait on us…"

"Ano…" Hakkai interrupted, "Isn't it the Merciful Goddess that set us on this journey?"

The blonde's glare intensified.

"So it's settled!" Gojyo rejoiced, grinning.

Goku held out his bowl silently to Hakkai for more, hiding his morose expression with his bangs and down turned face.

"Goku…" Hakkai said softly, but the monkey looked up and gave a parody of a smile that didn't reach his eyes. Hakkai shook his head and doled out more food to the young man.

"Sanzo-ikkou!" a voice called boisterously, an obvious cocky chuckle within the tone, "We have come on orders of our Prince Kougaiji to collect the Maten Kyomon, and with it, your lives!"

The ikkou rolled their eyes and Goku angrily put down his bowl, "Fucking youkai always interrupting my meals…"

"Language!" Hakkai called ineffectually as he walked calmly with Sanzo to cover the monk.

"First one to fifty, saru?" Gojyo asked, summoning his shakujou and grinning.

"You are so on!" Goku called, already racing to the hoard of youkai mercenaries.

Kenren joined the Sanzo party, his blade out and a grin on his face, not even bothering to speak as he jumped into the fray.

Tenpou followed behind him, looking morose to have his book time interrupted, "For this…you shall not be forgiven!" he called, unsheathing his saber and striking a badly dramatic pose. Konzen, the only one to witness the foolishness, sweatdropped awkwardly and mumbled under his breath about idiots.

Since he had little skills beyond the ability to beat the crap out of his errant charge and obnoxious friends, he stayed back to watch. His eyes stayed on Goku most of all, watching the so much taller monkey twirl with effortless grace and absolutely demolish all his challengers. There was a morbid beauty in the carefree spirit causing such destruction, and Konzen felt an odd thrill go through him as he watched the boy's adversaries go down.

And so the differences between his monkey and this one became clear. He loved them both terribly…enough to die for them, enough to willingly go into a painful reincarnated existence…but this lithe young man was not his. He was Sanzo's, and it showed in every adoring smile he flashed the monk, in every longing glance. Konzen's heart clenched, but at least he knew his favorite animal would be well cared for.

The battle wound down and a grinning monkey won the bet, crowing and puffing in delight. The fight had erased the melancholy from the boy, leaving his chattering aimlessly to everyone and himself. Konzen watched fondly as he was taken into a headlock by Kenren and tackled to the ground. Goku got the upper hand only to be thwarted when Kenren phased a foot away and cackled at the monkey's ineptitude.

Somehow, it was Goku who had the thought none of them had beforehand, "Hey…why don't we get them to do that cool phasing thing and take us to India?"

A long silence filled the clearing, then loud cursing from the two of the three elder members of the traveling group. Even Hakkai looked flabbergasted that he had not been the one to think of it.

"Well hell, the monkey has a brain after all!" Gojyo called, relishing in the glare he received.

"Baka ero kappa, I am not a monkey!"

A twinkling light called all their attention to the right, and Goku paled. In a distinctive flash of light, Kanzeon Bosatsu was smirking at them all, "Sorry boys, but I can't allow that."

Sanzo stormed up to the supposed Goddess of Mercy, "Why the fuck not, you stupid old bag?!"

Kanzeon glared, "Watch your mouth, Konzen. And none of you are ready yet to face the opposition you will encounter in the West. This journey is to hone you up to being strong enough for it, as a group and as fighters. Now shut up."

All the men were slightly taken aback by the biting tone, but realized the truth in her words. They really weren't ready yet. Sanzo's glare intensified but he didn't bother speaking. The haughty demeanor of the Merciful Goddess returned, casting a look on the three gods, "Time to go, boys."

Goku, who had never let his eyes leave the ground, began to shake, trying to ignore the pain that was shooting through him like a physical injury at those words. It wasn't long before a hand was ruffling his hair playfully, "Buck up, chibizaru. You already know we'll see you again…seems to me that we're all stuck together," Kenren said in a laughing tone thrown off by the seriousness of his blue eyes.

He was joined by Konzen and Tenpou in front of the young earth spirit, who looked them each in the eye and took a deep breath, holding back the pain and giving a weak smile, "Thank you. All of you, thank you."

"For what?" Konzen asked gruffly, his eyes on the ground and his shoulders tense.

"For keeping your promise," Goku said softly, a true smile stretching his lips, "What more could I ever want?"

It was with a fair amount of confusion that the three deities regarded him, but none of them asked. They figured they would understand at some point. The earth spirit launched himself at the three, hugging each of them around the waists tightly and giving morose goodbyes. The Sanzo party gave more reserved farewells, with Konzen and Sanzo ignoring one another rather than arguing, at least. As Kanzeon Bosatsu stood before them, she smirked, "Tell myself hi for me, boys."

And with a bright flash, they were gone, leaving the ikkou alone with a goddess. She turned her smirk on them, "Well, on with the journey, guys. I'm expecting a good show, so you'd better give me one, right? Oh, and I shall return Goujun to you now… Ja," she winked and disappeared, leaving an agitated looking Hakuryu behind.

Silently, the group packed their things and prepared to leave, none of them venturing to break the silence. Sanzo because he didn't feel like it, Hakkai and Gojyo in deference to Goku's feelings, and Goku simply because he was still trying to cope with his losses.

The sun was high in the sky by the time they set out once more, the jeep much quieter than usual. It was nearly an hour into the journey when Goku suddenly laughed, long and breathlessly, a few silent tears escaping his eyes as a wide grin relieved all worries of his companions.

"Yo…what's so funny?" Gojyo ventured, nudging the younger man with his elbow.

Goku's smile didn't fade as he turned to look directly at his guardian, "Once upon a time…"

----------

A/N: The last line won't make sense until the next chapter. ;) And moreso when we hear the end of it in the next story.

I hope people are still interested in this story… -sigh-

I got so very few reviews for my Complementary lemon. -sniff- Makes me oh so sad! -sniff-


	10. I Have Been Changed For Good

-1

DISCLAIMER: I don't own the boys, nor the plotlines of the show and manga. Story and chapter titles are actually from a song from _Wicked_…because the song is stuck in my head. Bah.

----------

**For Good**

…_I Have Been Changed For Good_

----------

_I've heard it said that people come into our lives_

_For a reason bringing something we must learn_

_And we are led to those who help us most to grow_

_If we let them and we help them in return_

_Well I don't know if I believe that's true_

_But I know I'm who I am today because I knew you…_

The trio was disoriented as they found themselves standing back in Tenpou's library, this time atop the collapsed bookshelf and blinked several times to try and gain their bearings. It was the Field Marshal's squeal of glee and subsequent latching onto his favorite book that laid on a nearby desk that snapped them out of it.

Konzen shook his head sadly, aware that his life would be coming to an untimely end. It was not a comforting thought, but somehow it was alright. They would all - all - be together again someday.

"So, Konzen-sama," Kenren drawled, a devious smirk on his lips, "Since you kissed the grown monkey, you gonna start letting this one have his wicked way with you?"

Konzen blushed magnificently, cracking his knuckles, "Shut the hell up, I have no idea what I was thinking."

"I bet I know what you were thinking…"

Said knuckles connected with the General's head.

With a lump forming, Kenren pouted and trailed after his lover out the door, leaving Konzen alone amidst mountains of books. He let his eyes trail lazily around the room, coming to rest on a little bronzed ball in the corner, puffy closed eyes telling of the boy having cried himself to sleep.

With a tiny fond smile, the blonde gathered his sleeping charge into his arms and started for his own room. He would deal with informing his aunt tomorrow, for now he wanted rest. Bypassing the monkey's cot completely, he carried the boy to his own bed and laid him down, climbing in and laying down a few inches from his charge and watching the childish features. He could imagine them transforming, growing into what the young man beside him would one day be. He trailed a finger down one chubby cheek.

With a jolt, the boy awoke and stared at him perplexedly. He cried out and lunged at the deity, wrapping shackled arms around his neck and squeezing for all he was worth.

"Konzen, Konzen, Konnnnzen!" he cried, practically bouncing, "You were gone for two whole days and nobody knew where you were and I was _alone_ and I didn't like it…where did you go?"

"It doesn't matter," the blonde huffed, unlatching the boy and laying on his back, arms crossed over his chest.

"Mou, kechi! Don't be like that, Konzen!"

A puff of laughter escaped the god then and he cracked the tiniest of smiles, "Want to hear a story, bakazaru?"

"Hai!" Goku chirped, seeming to forget completely about his questions and his master's disappearance, burying himself in the blankets and watching his guardian stare at the ceiling.

"Once upon a time," the blonde began wryly, unable to think of a better way, "There were four men. They seemed ordinary when you first saw them, but when you looked closer, you saw they were far from it. They were sent on a journey to far, far away to stop an evil demon from coming back to life…"

_**-Owari-**_

----------

A/N: First arc complete. Look for the sequel, and thank you for your reviews, lovies. I know this story was terribly inane and pointless, but I had fun writing it regardless. Will post here when I get the sequel up.

In the Works:

Sequel: Titled 'As Long as You're Mine'. With the revelations the heavenly trio's visit brought the boys, how will their relationships change? How long can denial of self and heart really last when your mind gives you all the outs you need? Sanzo finally finds his own meaning for 'Hold Nothing' and does something about it. ;)

Lead Me Not: Nii manages to perfect a whole new kind of Wave…one that influences youkai and ningen alike. What will come when the boys are sent through a plethora of emotions and forced to either trust one another…or die. SanzoGoku & HakkaiGojyo. Will have a drabble story released before it that as a companion piece before I post the story, chronicling the ten years AFTER the story. Drabbles titled Into Temptation. (sneak peek on my LJ, where I have posted the first several years)


End file.
